All Stressed ,Fearful, Worried Why?

Me stressed out, banish the thought. Ha, if you know me at all you, I'm like a picture of the cat which has just received an electric shock. Hair standing up with my eyes popping out, back arched. Get the pretty scary picture. The problem is I often don't think I'm stressed. Until my faithful flesh woman rears her ugly persona. If you've never met her, be very thankful. She's
my evil twin.
When stressed I seem to be the last to really notice, that is until I open my mouth inserting my size 7 shoe into it. I so lovingly call it ( fillet of sole). Get it shoe sole!! Sorry my sense of humor sometimes is a little off center. But it helps to have a sense of humor when stressed to the limit. But why do I continually let this happen, is the question you're asking! Haven't got a clue? Well I do. There is this thing called pride. God's been trying to teach me to let him have complete control. CONTROL yes it's a hard word, and even harder to relinquish it to someone else. After all who knows me better than me? My worst enemy is myself at times, or should I say at least 75% of the time.
In Bible study we're learning to not self talk. Me myself and I have had many meaningful , sometimes degrading talks. How can I do this? I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Where is my mind, is there nowhere to go? Great news I'm learning that in any and all situations God is waiting for me to invite Him to lead me. So there is always someplace to go, I just have to be willing to be lead instead of doing it my way.
One of these days I might just surprise myself. By getting it down to a science but for now I'll continue to learn. At a snails pace. I'm a progress in work. And I do mean WORK!!! But I will never give up, Because of God's grace and mercy. I have a chance to be all I can be through Him who strengthens me.
Fear is a weakness that often plagues me. Out of nowhere it strikes. My fears are unfounded at times, a product of an overactive imagination. Taking what someone says wrong, how they look at me, or what they don't say. Then the mind goes into overdrive. Okay what was that look for? Do I have food in my teeth? I know some of my questions aren't the most profound but? Do I really appear as stupid as I sound?I hope I'm not hate only one who has a frantic mind, that tries to second guess everything. I know I'm unique, I just don't want to be strange. All I want to be is normal. Okay what is the definition of normal? I saw a movie once that talked about a brain with a sign below it that said (abby-normal). I totally know what they are talking about. If my life is normal please someone give me abnormal I need a break.
No seriously I have so many wonderful people in my life who are always willing to gently nudge me, guide me along the narrow path. Giving me scriptural verses to help me. If I trust God my fears will be relieved.Trust is an issue with me. Trust wasn't a thing I had a-lot of growing up. Fears I knew all to well. a fear of being alone, of not saying the right words when I pray. That God will find the words silly. He never finds anything silly if I just talk to him like I'm talking to you. This mind has a hard time grasping this concept. With each passing day it becomes clearer.
The other morning I was unable to sleep. So I got up it was around 6:30 or little later. The sun was just starting to come over the horizon. It was so breathtaking. The clouds were arrayed in colors of purple, orange,red, with a hint of pink. Set against the skyline was the small cemetery down the street. Something stirred inside as stood on my front porch. There was no fear, panic or worry. Peace, quietness, awe, mostly wonder. If God could with just the touch of his hand or his words make this come to past. Then why do you have doubts, fears, worries. Can I God not take care of all these. Breathe freshness into you like the breeze you feel upon your face. Have I not lead you to where you are now? There is no fear if you come to me and ask me to help. JUST ASK! Wow a feather could have knocked me over. How many of my friends have been telling me this? I've asked and asked for God's help, but took it upon myself to finish his work. Now is the time for me to wait upon God and wait, listen. He will help if I give him time.